Someone please put an end to the awfulness

So, I'm occasionally overwhelmed with my need to see this strike end. I want my friends to be able to go back to work. I want my friends who still have their jobs to be able to keep them. I want to see the general economy of Los Angeles begin an upward trajectory. But mostly, I want Friday Night Lights back.

Selfish? Absolutely. Here's more selfish thoughts. I want the people who created that stupid lie detector test show to be thrown in prison and kept in solitary confinement so they can think about what they've done and how they are wrecking humanity. And then, I want the network execs who said, "Hey! What a great idea! Let's get some schmuck, hook him up to a lie detector and get him to confess that he molested children" to be forced to watch their show over and over, without being able to blink or look away, until their eyeballs bleed. Cause has anyone else imagined the pitch meeting where that one took place? Picture this...

INT. GIANT BOARDROOM-DAY

Our male executives in their conservative suits with the token tight-ass looking female are sitting around a giant conference table. Rather than looking depressed at the current state of the writers' strike, they are cheerful and buoyed at the idea of having an excuse to create nothing but cheap, crappy programming. The head of the network, JOE BLOWHARD, speaks.

JOE: Ok, people. The audience is hungry for new programming. And they are so hungry, that we air someone sitting in the middle of the room on a chair breathing and blinking during sweeps and as long as we add light cues and dramatic music, we'll win the night. Who has ideas?

EXEC #1: (Raising his hand) I like the chair idea! Let's explore that! And if we use public domain music, we don't have to pay for music licensing. And as long as the actor doesn't speak, we can pay him even less. This show could be cheaper than buying a local newspaper! Cheaper even than America's Funniest Home Videos!

JOE: Well, Exec #1, that was just a facetious example, so let's try to get beyond that one a bit. (Beat) But let's not take the idea off the table. Anyone else?

EXEC #2: How about if we get a bunch of idiots and hook them up to lie detectors and ask them if they've committed any crimes against the people they love? And we make the unknowing spouses and children and victims sit in front of them while they confess?

JOE: GENIUS! Will there be dramatic lighting and music cues?

EXEC #2: Of course!

JOE: We can just look for contestants on old episodes of the Jerry Springer show! I love it. But just in case it doesn't work, somebody start putting together a budget on the chair/breathing show. Meeting adjourned.

FADE TO BLACK

Bitter? You bet. Scared for the writers? 100%. Desperate to know how the Panthers are going to make it to state without Smash on FNL, abso-freakin'-lutely.

When I was younger, I loved me some Stephen King. Loved. Lots. Pages fell out of the books I read them so many times. And one of the stories he wrote that always creeped me out was a short story called The Long Walk. It was about a national competition that was televised (predates cable and the internet o'course.) All American citizens 18 and over were issued numbers and a lottery was drawn. The winning lottery numbers were forced to participate in a long walk. If at any time, they fell below walking four miles an hour, they were given three warnings. If they failed to speed back up to four MPH, they were shot and killed. They walked non-stop with no rests. They slept while they walked. I don't remember the details of the bathroom situation right now, but you get the point. The winner (aka the only one left alive) won one million dollars or something. (I may be a bit fuzzy on the prize details right now, but it was a lot of money in the 70s.)

Anyone else feel we are getting dangerously close to this kind of programming? Anyone else worried that a Stephen King story could become "reality TV?" Anyone else hopeful that the strike ending soon is a reality?

And yes friends. I am a television snob.